Calloused

I recently saw that someone had asked God to make their heart more like His, to see people the way Jesus sees them. This has, at various times in my life been a prayer that I have said, and meant, as well. Quite often lately I have seen people very differently. I will see their eyes, and sometimes it seems like I can FEEL pain, sometimes joy, without even knowing them at all. We have been reading Anne of Green Gables, so perhaps that gives some reason to the part where I imagine what their life might look like. I imagine who they come home to at he end of a work day, and how interactions might be. I hope I don't sound creepy in saying this. I guess it started when we were in New York and these tour guides were telling us all about the city. Their eyes just seemed so hollow...all these hundreds of thousands of people come to their city to see the "great" sites and it's their job to tell people over and over again about it. Most of the time all I could think of is what is it you REALLY want to talk about? What's really on your heart. They were cold, like, freezing cold, and likely didn't make enough money to live a very comfortable life in this very expensive city. I don't know what it was about the place, but it caught my heart. I guess it hasn't happened a whole lot since then, but a few times I have prayer for head people.
The problem with me, or maybe one of, is that I can have a heart for these people who I don't know, but sometimes it is hard for me to have that same heart of love and compassion for those close to me.
This all comes into my mind this morning because last night I had a frightening dream about my brother. This morning I could barely speak without crying, the more I pray, the more peace I feel, but I still wish I could hear his voice and tell him I love him.

My brother is in jail right now. This isn't the first time. He is hurting, lonely, in deep pain.

I was reading a fictional book about a girl who was put in jail and the awful conditions she endured and the atmosphere that surrounded her. I was broken for this girl - this Fictional! girl, yet I didn't feel like that about my own brother! You might think very low of me right now... When I put my true thoughts into words like this... I sure do. But last night God broke my heart for my brother. This morning we prayer deeply as a family for him, and I continue to do so. Sometimes we need God to break us, to see people through His eyes. It's far to easy to be hurt and offended by those around is, especially this closest to us. But we are called to a higher standard - to love. Not only when we are being loved in return.

I read Hebrews 13:3 that says,
Continue to remember those in prison as if you were together with them in prison, and those who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering.

I can't say that I've been doing that. I will pray for my brother, I will communicate to him that he is not alone and allow God to work through this sometimes calloused heart.